Praise You in this Storm by Casting Crowns
I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen"
and it's still raining -
As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God
Who gives and takes away.
I'll praise You in this storm -
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn...
I will praise You in this storm
I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You -
As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain -
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God
Who gives and takes away...
I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am -
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn -
I will praise You in this storm...
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth...
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth.
I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are -
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm.
_________________
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Sunday, September 24, 2006
Purity and the Honor of Homemaking
I've been mulling over the last 2 chapters for a few days. There are some excellent points and I know I've already discussed the purity chapter with you, Sara. But here are some comments worth repeating:
Make no provision for the flesh. Don't even be placed in a position where you are even tempted to compromise. That seems obvious but it's not - because the flesh is so weak. Why not go to that coffee shop where the cute guy works, what can you do when you come into contact with someone you feel attracted to within an innocent environment. Here's an excellent point: "We should not read anything, view anything, or listen to anything that arouses impure thoughts or compromises our biblical convitions. That would be sinful." I was just having a conversation with someone who agrees with that, but who enjoys watching movies too much to give it up. For the sake of a "good movie" we risk our purity of mind and we risk displeasing our Lord. It's not as easy as it sounds. Secondly, our thought life. What we do in the privacy of our home, our computer, in front of the TV, etc. "What we are at home, that we are indeed" says Spurgeon. How true.
The next section on Homemaking was liberating for me!!!
I take care of EVERYTHING at home: from the daily, expected domestic duties to taking care of bills, taxes, mortgage and oil changes. I deal with banks, insurance companies, and building contractors. I make the deals in the family, get discounts, organize investments and arrange EVERYTHING. And while many women do that, I have always felt a little resentful because of what I saw dad do. How much he took care of within the household. But reading this chapter has just about made me cry: "Working at home means we are to function as the home manager - taking FULL ownership for all the domestic duties of the household." FULL OWNERSHIP - PRAISE GOD!!! I'm doing exactly what He's called me to do!!! I don't have to wish my husband would be in charge of the bills and get the car fixed. I don't have to stress about him not mowing the lawn or putting up the shelving. I am in charge!!! I may ask him to do this and that graciously, but it is MY responsibility. Just setting that in my mind has freed me! Within that job description I will be able to perform freely and with joy.
Also, I need to learn and work on this: My husband needs my help and I need to help him. I think I paraphrased this but it's swimming in my mind. "I frequently make choices, pursue endeavors, and carry out duties in my home in a manner that serves ME instead of in a way that helps my husband." ooh, how convicting. I am a selfish person at heart and I want to pursue my own comfort and fun and you know Anthony how sweet he is to let me indulge once in a while. But I should be much more considerate how it will affect him and the family. As a wife, I need to build my life around my husband and HIS schedule instead of the other way around. As a 21st century woman, it couldn't go more against the tide of woman's rights and desires - but it's Scriptural and freedom and happiness are truly found there. We always have to replace the world's appealing lies with the solid truth to be biblical women! This book is helping me reinforce what I've already learned.
Jules
Make no provision for the flesh. Don't even be placed in a position where you are even tempted to compromise. That seems obvious but it's not - because the flesh is so weak. Why not go to that coffee shop where the cute guy works, what can you do when you come into contact with someone you feel attracted to within an innocent environment. Here's an excellent point: "We should not read anything, view anything, or listen to anything that arouses impure thoughts or compromises our biblical convitions. That would be sinful." I was just having a conversation with someone who agrees with that, but who enjoys watching movies too much to give it up. For the sake of a "good movie" we risk our purity of mind and we risk displeasing our Lord. It's not as easy as it sounds. Secondly, our thought life. What we do in the privacy of our home, our computer, in front of the TV, etc. "What we are at home, that we are indeed" says Spurgeon. How true.
The next section on Homemaking was liberating for me!!!
I take care of EVERYTHING at home: from the daily, expected domestic duties to taking care of bills, taxes, mortgage and oil changes. I deal with banks, insurance companies, and building contractors. I make the deals in the family, get discounts, organize investments and arrange EVERYTHING. And while many women do that, I have always felt a little resentful because of what I saw dad do. How much he took care of within the household. But reading this chapter has just about made me cry: "Working at home means we are to function as the home manager - taking FULL ownership for all the domestic duties of the household." FULL OWNERSHIP - PRAISE GOD!!! I'm doing exactly what He's called me to do!!! I don't have to wish my husband would be in charge of the bills and get the car fixed. I don't have to stress about him not mowing the lawn or putting up the shelving. I am in charge!!! I may ask him to do this and that graciously, but it is MY responsibility. Just setting that in my mind has freed me! Within that job description I will be able to perform freely and with joy.
Also, I need to learn and work on this: My husband needs my help and I need to help him. I think I paraphrased this but it's swimming in my mind. "I frequently make choices, pursue endeavors, and carry out duties in my home in a manner that serves ME instead of in a way that helps my husband." ooh, how convicting. I am a selfish person at heart and I want to pursue my own comfort and fun and you know Anthony how sweet he is to let me indulge once in a while. But I should be much more considerate how it will affect him and the family. As a wife, I need to build my life around my husband and HIS schedule instead of the other way around. As a 21st century woman, it couldn't go more against the tide of woman's rights and desires - but it's Scriptural and freedom and happiness are truly found there. We always have to replace the world's appealing lies with the solid truth to be biblical women! This book is helping me reinforce what I've already learned.
Jules
Monday, September 18, 2006
chapters 3 and 4
hi sis :D
chapter 3
i think the biggest thing that stuck out to me about this chapter was that a mother's mission is "grave and vast" - how differently the world tells us!
i know that the work of a mother and wife is sooo not glamarous, but how fitting for a servant of the Lord. Christ humbled Himself to live in man's flesh, to suffer sin, to endure death in order to deliver the souls of the world. surely that far outweighs our call to live in small spaces, to suffer the crying and whining of children, and to endure years of ministering to little ones in order to shepherd their souls to Christ. i pray that i will prepare and remember that my actions and decision, even now, will affect their souls in eternity
chapter 4
oh my. i think i needed this chapter. every segment was a stinger.
APPETITE: what really convicted me was that my desire to be thin is unbiblical. i always knew that i shouldn't want to be thin to be more attractive, or to garner more praise, but i think i tried to rationalize these desires by saying that i was *actually* trying to "be healthy" or "self controlled". of course these things are what i should have wanted from the beginning, but i would paste these "right answers" over the wrong ones so that i could keep indulging in my sinful desire to be praised by man. that sucks! but praise God, because i feel a difference in my attitude about my weight. i've been trying to exercise, but haven't been checking the scale! i refuse to be enslaved that anymore haha. i also used to eat and feel super guilty afterward, and would starve myself the next meal. but Mahaney's reminder that the Scripture tells us that God has given us food to *enjoy* made me see that my feelings of guilt and shame were not branching from a sense of offending my Lord, but rather from a sense of offending *myself* by not doing what would make me most attractive. i'm going to try to enjoy my food more, :) but NOT gluttonously hahah
SLEEP: i don't think you know this, but i have really terrible sleeping patterns. last semester, i got an average of 4 or 5 hours of sleep a night. i would go to class, maybe meet up with ppl or do some sort of ministry, and then go straight to the library, where i would stay until 2 am. after that, i would go home and sleep (on a good day) or stay up indefinitely. this summer, i made it a big goal to regulate my sleeping, so i got it up to 6 or 7 hours a night. :) this semester, it has been a temptation for me to stay up again because i've been feeling pretty overwhelmed with my classes. it hasn't gotten too bad yet, although i've pulled an all nighter, but there have been bad days where i know it would have been more effective for me to sleep rather than to try to do work all groggy headed and delirious. it was rebuking for me to hear that staying up late past what our body requires is not diligence, but SELFISHNESS. i can definitely relate to that. it was selfishness that would make me push back all my responsibilities until the night, when i would try to get it all done "on my time". there was also a sense of pride in my ability to pull all nighters, and work late into the night when my friends couldn't stay up past midnight. i secretly thought prided myself in being diligent when i was just being stupid, prideful, and selfish. praise God for making this sin explicit - i had known it was displeasing to God before, but i think i really needed it to be stated clearly for me to prioritize fighting against it.
THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS: heh heh. i think you know that i have been struggling to take control of my thoughts these days. i guess just to update you, i have been praying a loot about it, have written out and memorize phil 4:8, 2 cor 10:5, and col 3:2, 3. i've also taken some measures - i decided to stop chatting to people online for this whole week. please pray for me that these measures are not of my own strength, but by the initiative of the Holy Spirit, and that He would give me success for His sake
:D yeah, i really needed that last chapter.
btw, can you please pray for me? this past week, there was an informational meeting for missions to taiwan this winter (the same as the one i was going to go on last winter). and jules...i really REALLY want to go. i've never desired this so intensely before! but at the same time, there is a trembling of spirit - are my intentions right and glorifying to the Lord? what if my heart is wrong, and i go, only to mar His name and lead others astray? please pray for my purity of motives, and a desire for Him and Him alone, whether i go on missions or not. please pray that the doors would open also, if it's His will, namely by getting permission from umma and yuyeon. and for me to be content and give praise to Him, even if i can't go.
:)
oh, btw, the next chapter looks a little...err....weird for me. hahah. can you read it first and tell me whether it's ok? i'll read chapter 6 in the meantime :P
i love you
His,
sara
chapter 3
i think the biggest thing that stuck out to me about this chapter was that a mother's mission is "grave and vast" - how differently the world tells us!
i know that the work of a mother and wife is sooo not glamarous, but how fitting for a servant of the Lord. Christ humbled Himself to live in man's flesh, to suffer sin, to endure death in order to deliver the souls of the world. surely that far outweighs our call to live in small spaces, to suffer the crying and whining of children, and to endure years of ministering to little ones in order to shepherd their souls to Christ. i pray that i will prepare and remember that my actions and decision, even now, will affect their souls in eternity
chapter 4
oh my. i think i needed this chapter. every segment was a stinger.
APPETITE: what really convicted me was that my desire to be thin is unbiblical. i always knew that i shouldn't want to be thin to be more attractive, or to garner more praise, but i think i tried to rationalize these desires by saying that i was *actually* trying to "be healthy" or "self controlled". of course these things are what i should have wanted from the beginning, but i would paste these "right answers" over the wrong ones so that i could keep indulging in my sinful desire to be praised by man. that sucks! but praise God, because i feel a difference in my attitude about my weight. i've been trying to exercise, but haven't been checking the scale! i refuse to be enslaved that anymore haha. i also used to eat and feel super guilty afterward, and would starve myself the next meal. but Mahaney's reminder that the Scripture tells us that God has given us food to *enjoy* made me see that my feelings of guilt and shame were not branching from a sense of offending my Lord, but rather from a sense of offending *myself* by not doing what would make me most attractive. i'm going to try to enjoy my food more, :) but NOT gluttonously hahah
SLEEP: i don't think you know this, but i have really terrible sleeping patterns. last semester, i got an average of 4 or 5 hours of sleep a night. i would go to class, maybe meet up with ppl or do some sort of ministry, and then go straight to the library, where i would stay until 2 am. after that, i would go home and sleep (on a good day) or stay up indefinitely. this summer, i made it a big goal to regulate my sleeping, so i got it up to 6 or 7 hours a night. :) this semester, it has been a temptation for me to stay up again because i've been feeling pretty overwhelmed with my classes. it hasn't gotten too bad yet, although i've pulled an all nighter, but there have been bad days where i know it would have been more effective for me to sleep rather than to try to do work all groggy headed and delirious. it was rebuking for me to hear that staying up late past what our body requires is not diligence, but SELFISHNESS. i can definitely relate to that. it was selfishness that would make me push back all my responsibilities until the night, when i would try to get it all done "on my time". there was also a sense of pride in my ability to pull all nighters, and work late into the night when my friends couldn't stay up past midnight. i secretly thought prided myself in being diligent when i was just being stupid, prideful, and selfish. praise God for making this sin explicit - i had known it was displeasing to God before, but i think i really needed it to be stated clearly for me to prioritize fighting against it.
THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS: heh heh. i think you know that i have been struggling to take control of my thoughts these days. i guess just to update you, i have been praying a loot about it, have written out and memorize phil 4:8, 2 cor 10:5, and col 3:2, 3. i've also taken some measures - i decided to stop chatting to people online for this whole week. please pray for me that these measures are not of my own strength, but by the initiative of the Holy Spirit, and that He would give me success for His sake
:D yeah, i really needed that last chapter.
btw, can you please pray for me? this past week, there was an informational meeting for missions to taiwan this winter (the same as the one i was going to go on last winter). and jules...i really REALLY want to go. i've never desired this so intensely before! but at the same time, there is a trembling of spirit - are my intentions right and glorifying to the Lord? what if my heart is wrong, and i go, only to mar His name and lead others astray? please pray for my purity of motives, and a desire for Him and Him alone, whether i go on missions or not. please pray that the doors would open also, if it's His will, namely by getting permission from umma and yuyeon. and for me to be content and give praise to Him, even if i can't go.
:)
oh, btw, the next chapter looks a little...err....weird for me. hahah. can you read it first and tell me whether it's ok? i'll read chapter 6 in the meantime :P
i love you
His,
sara
Saturday, September 09, 2006
More books I want to read...!
Here's another list of books I either just bought and intend to read, or is in my Amazon cart and I would like to read. If any of these appeal to you, just let me know. I'll save them for when you can read it with me.
The Cross of Christ by John Stott
Sinners in the hand of an angry God by Jonathan Edwards
Prayer: Finding the Heart's True Home by Richard Foster
Overcoming Sin And Temptation: Three Classic Works - John Owen
A God-Entranced Vision of All Things: The Legacy of Jonathan Edwards - John Piper
The Sermons of Jonathan Edwards: A reader by Jonathan Edwards
Putting Amazing Back into Grace,: Embracing the Heart of the Gospel
The Mortification of Sin by John Owen
Whaddaya think? :-)
Jules
The Cross of Christ by John Stott
Sinners in the hand of an angry God by Jonathan Edwards
Prayer: Finding the Heart's True Home by Richard Foster
Overcoming Sin And Temptation: Three Classic Works - John Owen
A God-Entranced Vision of All Things: The Legacy of Jonathan Edwards - John Piper
The Sermons of Jonathan Edwards: A reader by Jonathan Edwards
Putting Amazing Back into Grace,: Embracing the Heart of the Gospel
The Mortification of Sin by John Owen
Whaddaya think? :-)
Jules
Friday, September 08, 2006
loving my (future) husband
hi yules :)
i finished the second chapter yesterday :D
i'm so grateful that she wrote about this. ha, i think it's safe to say that i'm looking forward to getting married and all, but honestly, when i think about the married life itself, i kinda get apprehensive. NOT that you guys don't display the beauty of a God-centered marriage, but i think having the opportunity to watch your and yuyeon's marriages have shaped a lot of how i perceive marriage. on the one hand, i'm so grateful for having older sisters, because i know that marriage can be full of love, growth, fellowship, and above all, a joined striving for the things of the Lord. but on the other, i know that marriage is hard, and if anything, i'll struggle and deal with more after i get married. :( and this scares me. i feel like i should be expecting marriage to be great, but as of right now, i feel like i *know* it's not going to be all that wonderful. :( is that bad?
i also feel apprehensive because i fear that i will become a loveless wife. i know my tendency is to take for granted those i love, and unless they meet *my* needs and *my* expectations, unless they are like-minded with *my* convictions, then it is difficult for me to show tenderness and affection. "they obviously do not respect their husbands. They certainly do not have tender feelings for them. Yet that does not hinder these women from continuing to wash their husbands' clothes, cook their meals, and clean the house for them." i don't want to be one of these women!!
in any case, i'm glad that the Lord has allowed me to read this chapter, because it really addressed a lot of my apprehensions. her talking about our sinfulness in expectations and self-centeredness confirms that marriage will indeed have its share of struggles and difficulties, but this quote really put things into perspective for me - "Although we both are sinners, God is using our marriage to help us grow in godliness. In fact, our husbands' particular sins, unique weaknesses, and even their idiosyncracies are tailor made for us. Likewise, our sins and weaknesses are custom designed for them. Both husbands and wives will become more Christlike by having to deal with each other's sins and deficiencies."
this really hit me! God is, even now, sovereignly working in our own individual lives to shape us to be the people, sins and all, He desires us to be when we meet and marry. He is molding the two of us to complement one another, not only in strengths, but in weaknesses also, that we may more efficiently glorify Him together. even more than this, our having to encounter each others sins is not a bad thing, but a blessed opportunity to glorify Him through our love and graciousness for one another. through it, He gives us the chance to grow in prayer, service, and accountability, all for His sake. :D coool!
i pray that i may always keep my eyes and heart upon the Savior, whether as a single, or a married woman. may we approach sins, whether our own or another's, not with fear and anxiety, but with great rejoicing that in our weaknesses, He is strong, in our inabilities, He is sufficient, in our faithlessness, He is ever faithful.
on to chapter three!
i finished the second chapter yesterday :D
i'm so grateful that she wrote about this. ha, i think it's safe to say that i'm looking forward to getting married and all, but honestly, when i think about the married life itself, i kinda get apprehensive. NOT that you guys don't display the beauty of a God-centered marriage, but i think having the opportunity to watch your and yuyeon's marriages have shaped a lot of how i perceive marriage. on the one hand, i'm so grateful for having older sisters, because i know that marriage can be full of love, growth, fellowship, and above all, a joined striving for the things of the Lord. but on the other, i know that marriage is hard, and if anything, i'll struggle and deal with more after i get married. :( and this scares me. i feel like i should be expecting marriage to be great, but as of right now, i feel like i *know* it's not going to be all that wonderful. :( is that bad?
i also feel apprehensive because i fear that i will become a loveless wife. i know my tendency is to take for granted those i love, and unless they meet *my* needs and *my* expectations, unless they are like-minded with *my* convictions, then it is difficult for me to show tenderness and affection. "they obviously do not respect their husbands. They certainly do not have tender feelings for them. Yet that does not hinder these women from continuing to wash their husbands' clothes, cook their meals, and clean the house for them." i don't want to be one of these women!!
in any case, i'm glad that the Lord has allowed me to read this chapter, because it really addressed a lot of my apprehensions. her talking about our sinfulness in expectations and self-centeredness confirms that marriage will indeed have its share of struggles and difficulties, but this quote really put things into perspective for me - "Although we both are sinners, God is using our marriage to help us grow in godliness. In fact, our husbands' particular sins, unique weaknesses, and even their idiosyncracies are tailor made for us. Likewise, our sins and weaknesses are custom designed for them. Both husbands and wives will become more Christlike by having to deal with each other's sins and deficiencies."
this really hit me! God is, even now, sovereignly working in our own individual lives to shape us to be the people, sins and all, He desires us to be when we meet and marry. He is molding the two of us to complement one another, not only in strengths, but in weaknesses also, that we may more efficiently glorify Him together. even more than this, our having to encounter each others sins is not a bad thing, but a blessed opportunity to glorify Him through our love and graciousness for one another. through it, He gives us the chance to grow in prayer, service, and accountability, all for His sake. :D coool!
i pray that i may always keep my eyes and heart upon the Savior, whether as a single, or a married woman. may we approach sins, whether our own or another's, not with fear and anxiety, but with great rejoicing that in our weaknesses, He is strong, in our inabilities, He is sufficient, in our faithlessness, He is ever faithful.
on to chapter three!
Enjoying the rugrats
Chapter 3 covers our privilege of loving (and ENJOYING) our children that God has blessed us with! Identifying the factor that leads to our exasperation helped me: "Because mothering requires constant sacrifice, the temptations to resentment, complaining, and self-pity are always close at hand. But such selfishness will quickly sap the strength of our love for our children." It does require sacrifice - I often feel that it's unfair my life should be so dramatically adjusted for the sake of someone else a quarter the size of me! I realized that I often go through the day without a trace of a smile and with a lot of stress trying to complete the overcommitted checklist of things I have to get through in a day... and the ones who suffer the most are my kids. I have made an effort today (and by the grace of God will continue every day) to make sure I spend enough time nurturing the joy I have for my children.
Do you know, it really makes me sad when I do hear about moms not enjoying their children? Or they can't wait to get them into preschool so they can be free to live their own lives again, or it's obvious that children are more of a burden than a blessing? I am guilty of this sometimes. I think the Lord grieves over it, a thousand times more hurtful than the gift receiver blatantly rejecting the precious gift of the Giver. "Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a REWARD. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. BLESSED is the man who fills his quiver with them!"
And of course, the issue of their little souls. "Every step you take about them, every plan, scheme, arrangement that concerns them, do not leave out that mighty question, 'How will this affect their souls?" I know that this is not a question I ask myself all the time but I intend to as we continue our responsibility taking care of my littles.
Phew, I start the next chapter with trepidation: Self-control...! This one's really interesting (wondering if we could play something like what's described... you'll know what I mean when you read it!)
Do you know, it really makes me sad when I do hear about moms not enjoying their children? Or they can't wait to get them into preschool so they can be free to live their own lives again, or it's obvious that children are more of a burden than a blessing? I am guilty of this sometimes. I think the Lord grieves over it, a thousand times more hurtful than the gift receiver blatantly rejecting the precious gift of the Giver. "Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a REWARD. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. BLESSED is the man who fills his quiver with them!"
And of course, the issue of their little souls. "Every step you take about them, every plan, scheme, arrangement that concerns them, do not leave out that mighty question, 'How will this affect their souls?" I know that this is not a question I ask myself all the time but I intend to as we continue our responsibility taking care of my littles.
Phew, I start the next chapter with trepidation: Self-control...! This one's really interesting (wondering if we could play something like what's described... you'll know what I mean when you read it!)
Sunday, September 03, 2006
So what about feminine appeal?
Hey sisters! I decided to start another post altogether. I've started reading this book and it's going to be hard not to read it all in one shot. For one, it's easy, and 2nd, it's very practical.
I wish I had read and studied more about being a biblical woman before I had gotten married. I came into marriage with very little idea of biblical worth and a LOT of selfishness that I sometimes regret. However, the Lord has been good to show me many things and I am enjoying a better marriage now.
So, how about this passage for starters. "Our conduct has a direct influence on how people think about the gospel. The world doesn't judge us by our theology; the world judges us by our behavior. People don't necessarily want to know what we believe about the Bible. They want to see if what we believe makes a difference in our lives. Our actions either bring honor to God or misrepresent His truth."
Now I want to take it a step further. I am guilty of being surrounded - too surrounded by Christians! Where is my opportunity to witness in that? Anyway, I think that we can even procur the right reaction to our situation when Christian eyes are upon us and we develop a false sense of our godliness. But is the gospel alive in my heart and in my thoughts when no one looks? When I'm talking to my husband? When I'm watching my kids? When I'm facing stress and uncertainty? Is the gospel alive? Is it REALLY making a difference IN ME? I ask myself this with conviction. Does my husband see the gospel in me? Do my children witness the gospel in me? Do my own sisters? This is the question I need to answer.
I just ordered Jonathan Edwards' resolutions (yes, my book fast is over) Here's the one in the Feminine appeal book: "Resolved, whenever my feelings begin to appear in the least out of order, when I am conscious of the least uneasiness within, or the least irregularity without, I will then subject myself to the strictest examination." Wouldn't that alone stop the sin and anger and bitterness that so easily spirals into pitiful bouts of selfish resentment? When I feel irritated with his behavior, or when I am easily turned off by his suggestions.... if I examine myself in secret, wouldn't the Holy Spirit, as a light and magnifying glass, reveal that root of sin and pride?
I'm dealing with a bit of this right now. Not exactly in the area of marriage but in other areas. This affects me as a biblical woman. Lord, reveal the wrong in my heart and even if it breaks me, dig that sinful root out!
I wish I had read and studied more about being a biblical woman before I had gotten married. I came into marriage with very little idea of biblical worth and a LOT of selfishness that I sometimes regret. However, the Lord has been good to show me many things and I am enjoying a better marriage now.
So, how about this passage for starters. "Our conduct has a direct influence on how people think about the gospel. The world doesn't judge us by our theology; the world judges us by our behavior. People don't necessarily want to know what we believe about the Bible. They want to see if what we believe makes a difference in our lives. Our actions either bring honor to God or misrepresent His truth."
Now I want to take it a step further. I am guilty of being surrounded - too surrounded by Christians! Where is my opportunity to witness in that? Anyway, I think that we can even procur the right reaction to our situation when Christian eyes are upon us and we develop a false sense of our godliness. But is the gospel alive in my heart and in my thoughts when no one looks? When I'm talking to my husband? When I'm watching my kids? When I'm facing stress and uncertainty? Is the gospel alive? Is it REALLY making a difference IN ME? I ask myself this with conviction. Does my husband see the gospel in me? Do my children witness the gospel in me? Do my own sisters? This is the question I need to answer.
I just ordered Jonathan Edwards' resolutions (yes, my book fast is over) Here's the one in the Feminine appeal book: "Resolved, whenever my feelings begin to appear in the least out of order, when I am conscious of the least uneasiness within, or the least irregularity without, I will then subject myself to the strictest examination." Wouldn't that alone stop the sin and anger and bitterness that so easily spirals into pitiful bouts of selfish resentment? When I feel irritated with his behavior, or when I am easily turned off by his suggestions.... if I examine myself in secret, wouldn't the Holy Spirit, as a light and magnifying glass, reveal that root of sin and pride?
I'm dealing with a bit of this right now. Not exactly in the area of marriage but in other areas. This affects me as a biblical woman. Lord, reveal the wrong in my heart and even if it breaks me, dig that sinful root out!
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